what happens now

I wish I could write all the things that are going on in my head down in this blog. But I can't. 

I don't know why my mind keeps going to that place. It's almost like it's a comfort to me. It seems as though whenever I'm on the verge of a breakdown, I can stop and go over that certain time in my life and remember how I felt, how happy I was, and it feels as though I'm escaping reality for awhile.

Why? I would really like the answer to that question. I ask it to myself all the time. How did I get to where I am now from where I was so close to being before.

Sometimes if I think hard enough, I actually wish I could be there. Where I have dreamt of my life being a few times before.

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